Hi bloggers. Sorry I haven't been posting much, as I mentioned previously, I have started to feel a bit superstitious about my blog.
We had our nuchal scan on Monday and all looked perfect. We saw the baby's brain (can't take after my side of the family as it has one... ho ho, chortle, chortle), arms, legs, spine and heard the heartbeat for the first time. We were delighted and relieved but I didn't cry.
We spent that evening calling and telling people, some of them sounded more excited than us. In fact, that worried me a bit. Why are people more excited than me? It felt wrong telling people, like I am some sort of fraudster/imposter and I am not really pregnant at all. I don't feel much different, apart from extreme tiredness and occasional mild nausea, though I look pregnant (many friends said they knew before I told them as I look pregnant- must be bloat).
I know many people cry when they see their baby on the screen or hear the heartbeat- I didn't. Am I made of stone?
I wonder if, one some level, I am protecting myself. Due to the time taken to get here, I think I still don't believe it will happen. I can't imagine giving birth, I can't imagine breastfeeding, hell, I can't imagine having a real bump or being kicked by the baby.
I am not giving myself a hard time, but I surprised myself with my reaction.
Wednesday 29 February 2012
Friday 17 February 2012
Pain in the arse colleagues
Well, inspired by Sushi Girl's entry about irritating colleagues, I thought I would post about one of mine.
To start with, her voice is so annoying. She sounds like Katie Price (Jordan). If you don't know how she speaks, it's through her nose, long and drawn out, common and bored. She says, "Oh, ffffannnk yooooooou." She's a bit of a bitch and spends a lot of time at other people's desks whispering, pulling faces. You wouldn't think she is 29.
She got married in 2010 and ALL she spoke about for 2 years was her sodding wedding. She obviously had a massive, tacky engagement ring (and an engagement party and spent more money on her specially made engagement party dress than I spent on my wedding dress). The wedding had around 300 guests and, as you can probably guess, she wore a massive, puff-ball wedding dress and had chocolate fountains every where at the reception (so I am told). I saw a hilarous video clip on her fbook page. It was one of those tacky photo montages of her and her husband from babies to adulthood then photos of them out together, on holiday etc- they showed it at the wedding and it was 10 minutes long. 10 minutes. I couldn't sit through that, even if it was about me!
She is the kind of person who loves to be the centre of attention and is so fake. She also flirts inapproriately with 50 year old married colleagues (who should know better than to flirt back). As I type she is loudly taking to some workmates about the fact that she has a 18-year-old niece (so an adult and only 11 years younger than her) and she dislikes how the niece never calls her aunty. She said, in a whingy voice, "I would like her to acknowledge that I am her auuuuuuuuuuuuunty sometimes." Get a grip woman, you were 11 when she was born! I have several nieces and nephews, all children, and not one of them calls me aunty!
About 3 weeks ago, I got into work to find the office was bedlam. Everyone was standing around her desk cooing and generally causing a fuss. I had an inkling of what was going on. Someone told me, "She's pregnant and it's twins."
Yes, it would be wouldn't it.
To start with, her voice is so annoying. She sounds like Katie Price (Jordan). If you don't know how she speaks, it's through her nose, long and drawn out, common and bored. She says, "Oh, ffffannnk yooooooou." She's a bit of a bitch and spends a lot of time at other people's desks whispering, pulling faces. You wouldn't think she is 29.
She got married in 2010 and ALL she spoke about for 2 years was her sodding wedding. She obviously had a massive, tacky engagement ring (and an engagement party and spent more money on her specially made engagement party dress than I spent on my wedding dress). The wedding had around 300 guests and, as you can probably guess, she wore a massive, puff-ball wedding dress and had chocolate fountains every where at the reception (so I am told). I saw a hilarous video clip on her fbook page. It was one of those tacky photo montages of her and her husband from babies to adulthood then photos of them out together, on holiday etc- they showed it at the wedding and it was 10 minutes long. 10 minutes. I couldn't sit through that, even if it was about me!
She is the kind of person who loves to be the centre of attention and is so fake. She also flirts inapproriately with 50 year old married colleagues (who should know better than to flirt back). As I type she is loudly taking to some workmates about the fact that she has a 18-year-old niece (so an adult and only 11 years younger than her) and she dislikes how the niece never calls her aunty. She said, in a whingy voice, "I would like her to acknowledge that I am her auuuuuuuuuuuuunty sometimes." Get a grip woman, you were 11 when she was born! I have several nieces and nephews, all children, and not one of them calls me aunty!
About 3 weeks ago, I got into work to find the office was bedlam. Everyone was standing around her desk cooing and generally causing a fuss. I had an inkling of what was going on. Someone told me, "She's pregnant and it's twins."
Yes, it would be wouldn't it.
Thursday 2 February 2012
Relief
Thank you all for your lovely kind comments, thoughts and prayers.
My GP referred me to the EPU immediately, and I have had my scan. It's good news. The bean now looks like a prawn and I am measuring at 9+1 (my exact dates) and there was a lovely heartbeat. The sonographer said that my placenta is low which is what probably caused the bleeding (and may cause more). Now I have been referred, I can go back any time I want without seeing the GP first (that is, if I am worried and get any heavy bleeding).
I can't believe it! The bleeding stopped yesterday pretty much straight after I saw it, but it really is alarming to see bright red blood, especially as my nausea disappeared. It's back today (the nausea not the bleeding), perhaps the worry made it go away?
I haven't been blogging much, mainly because I almost feel that if I do something will go wrong. You know how you blog your period is late then it turns up the next day. I will update but not as much as I used to but I am still reading your blogs and commenting if I feel I can offer support or have something interesting/intelligent to say.
My GP referred me to the EPU immediately, and I have had my scan. It's good news. The bean now looks like a prawn and I am measuring at 9+1 (my exact dates) and there was a lovely heartbeat. The sonographer said that my placenta is low which is what probably caused the bleeding (and may cause more). Now I have been referred, I can go back any time I want without seeing the GP first (that is, if I am worried and get any heavy bleeding).
I can't believe it! The bleeding stopped yesterday pretty much straight after I saw it, but it really is alarming to see bright red blood, especially as my nausea disappeared. It's back today (the nausea not the bleeding), perhaps the worry made it go away?
I haven't been blogging much, mainly because I almost feel that if I do something will go wrong. You know how you blog your period is late then it turns up the next day. I will update but not as much as I used to but I am still reading your blogs and commenting if I feel I can offer support or have something interesting/intelligent to say.
Wednesday 1 February 2012
9 weeks today and all is not rosy
Well I am 9 weeks today and had some bleeding. It started as spotting and got heavier and was definite red blood. There is nothing there now but I am bricking it. Earliest appointment I can get at GP is 9:20am and I have to go there before I can go to the EPU for a scan. I just hope they can scan me tmw as they EPU is referral only but it's first come first served and they stop accepting patients at 11:30 or something.
Please keep your fingers crossed for me ladies.
Please keep your fingers crossed for me ladies.
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